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Thursday, December 24, 2009

I'm still heartbroken :'(


I hate work & those dumb inefficient people related to it. X-(

And I'm still heartbroken. :'(

Malas nak senaman dgn trainer hari ni. :(

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

My poor baby =(( =((

My poor baby ada dent!! :'( :'( :'(
I hit the corner of a wall while reverse parking at Chadstone :'(
My vision was slightly blurry since morning by the time sampai kat Chadstone my brain dah berpinar-pinar coz of the very bright sun. Found a parking spot somewhere in the KMart area, but situ banyak sgt blind spot. Parking spot tu basenye dinding corner/ giant tiangs & kereta yg park sebelah spot tu ialah kereta pendek yg hampir2 naik curb sebelah dinding tu. Dlm pinar2 tu my mistake made the car as a referance while reverse parking, becoz kereta sebelah lagi saaaangat panjang & terkeluar spot. Blakang plak corner of a wall kaler putih. Memang tak nampak. :'(
Sedih gilaaaa ada 1 dent at the back of my new car. :'(
Mesti pasal of the blind spots, silau outside, & me not looking hard enuf plus my slow reaction to move forward bila dah hit the corner of the wall tu :'( :'( :'(
Rasa cam nak gantung diri je.. huhuhuhuhuuuuuuu... :'(
I am really really really heartbroken :'(

Anyways, bought house stuff, then retail therapy beli My Coach Fitness Get Fit Wii dvd. Boleh tahan la senaman dia. Terasa cam ada personal trainer sendiri.
I forgot about the car a litle bit. Tapi now teringat balik. :( :'( Terasa nak nangis now in my bedroom :'(

Sunday, December 20, 2009

Jungle Trekking

Our yard had been neglected for probably months that the view from the outside, our house might have been like a haunted hut in the middle of a scary jungle. Seriously, cam tu la pandangan mata aku setiap kali aku kuar & masuk rumah.

Being obsessive compulsive, I had been thinking lots about snipping the grass, pruning, cutting branches, weeding, etc. Even kat tempat kerja. Setiap hari aku akan fikir about it. Setiap kali balik kerja aku akan dok dlm kereta jap, sort of planning my way to the yard. Obsess nyer pasal kot. Well, this in one of the many ways aku cope with life stressors (ni jangkit from Dr D la ni :P). But I remember last time I did it myself
badan aku akan sakit2 gila (marah kat hubby nyer pasal aku gi snip rumput & potong dahan2 pokok). This time dah nekad dah nak ajak hubby join sama. Its our yard after all.

So yesterday pagi2 lagi afta breakie kami pon start la potong sana sini, bit by bit clearing the jungle until early arvo. It was a good weather to work on the garden. Gila penat. Tak sempat habis semua coz baaaaaaanyaaaaaaaak sgt. Tapi by the end of yesterday dah nampak clear sket. Kena alih all the 3 cars outside on the streets before starting doing it, and by the time masukkan balik kereta2 tu aku terasa relieved sket. Bila bukak pintu from my car takde la terasa cam dahan pokok hampas tu cam nak tercucuk mata aku or tercalarkan my face or terlukakan my car (I like to reverse park so that easy to chiao pagi2). Malam tu gila sakit badan. Popped some NSAIDs & lega sket (harap2 takde la exacerbation of this stoopid gastritis). Hubby pon sakit badan gak, could tell from his snoring both masa arvo nap & malam. Tapi dia ni ngelat je lebih :P

Pagi ni sambung lagi kat backyard plak. It was a good weather again. Gila aaahh! Ni lagi la cam hutan belantara. Aku kena really berhati2 coz byk lebah2 kat pokok bunga blakang rumah yg dulu ditanam oleh landlord. Before started, I slapped on sunblock & lotsa insect repellent & also my lucky yellow beach
hat. Tak nak kena sengat, kang pengsan. Coz kat blakang nyer hutan lebih dasyat dp kat depan rumah, aku jumpa banyak gila insects & ulat2 lepas dah tebang2 tu sumer. Jijiks! Tapi nak buat cam mana kena hapuskan gak sumer2 ni. Kang susah nak jemur kain.

Ckp pasal jemur kain, I remember early this yr masa marah kat hubby aku dok snipping some trees & grass kat blakang. Masa snip pokok pagar kat tpt jemur kain tu aku ter'snip' salah satu line jemur kain tu. Huish.. tu la.. marah sangat sampai sumer pon bantai je. Dosa kat suami.
Astaghfirullahaladzim!
Anyways, tadi aku buat sungguh2 & hati2. Hubby still ngelat sket2. Tapi takpe, yg penting aku takde la buat menda ni sorang2.

Dlm tempoh 2 hari ni, 2 trips to Bunnings. Hubby beli mini garden bins, gergaji 2 biji (satu letrik, satu manual), pruning scissors, some seeds, rake & apa ntah lagi. Berguna.

Masalah kami sejak yesteday is takde green bin. Memang masa pindah sini dulu takde green bin & kami tak pernah peduli coz slalu rajin bersihkan sket2 & longgokan daun2 tu bubuh je kat tepi pokok that in a few months dah jadi kompos. Tapi kali ni hasil tuaian hutan belantara tu rasanye 3 green bin tu pon still tak cukup. Dah la penuh dgn ulat2. Yucks! Ikutkan hati nak je biar kat halaman blakang tu & kat bwh2 pokok. Aku dah memang gelisah habis dgn sepah2 ni. So hubby cadangkan panggil green waste people, and thank God, it was definitely a damn good idea. Org tu siap bunuh weed lagi. Bagus. Tah yah aku penat2 terbongkok-bongkok cabut rumpai2 tu lagi. A very pricey idea I would rather say.
Dipendekkan cerita maka terang benderanglah our yard. Alhamdulillah.
Clear otak aku bila bukak pintu rumah ni.
Segar rasanye.
Luar dah mcm halaman rumah manusia. =P

Aku sedar by getting rid of some of the greens maknanye makin sikit pokok2 yg nak get rid of carbon dioxide. But we hafta balance the fire risks now dah masuk summer & peak summer blom menunjukkan taringnye lagi. At least bila yard dah clean kurang la sket pergeseran dedaun kering/segar & spark any fire. I noticed last yr some of the pokok hangus dlm panas above 43°c tu. Better be careful this time. Well, all in all its gonna be a vicious cycle anyways.. poor us living in the warmth of the globe all coz our own fault.

Unfortunately takde gambar of the yard before & after. Malu lah! Huduh sgt so mmg takde keinginan nak amik gambar =P

Ada lagi sket2 nak kena trim & fix. We'll continue next week. Hari ni dah sakit badan gila. My hands pon dah terketar-ketar je bila nak tulis or type. Tapi aku puas coz senaman membina otot berjaya. Tambah lagi dgn 50 sit ups semalam & hari ni. Ada la stop2 sket coz tak larat dah kerja kuat siangnye. Takpe, aku aim nak buat sit ups (and push ups) sampai lebih kurang 100 setiap hari non-stop like I used to masa karate dulu. Teringat kat one of my uncles used to buat 150-200 sit ups a day masa dia muda2 dulu & now he's in his 50s, kempis je perut dia (ada la kendur skit2).

Oh ye, smlm aku masak chicken pomegranate as a reward for our success.
Ni inspiried by Restaurant City menu dlm FB. Tapi tu guna lamb & hafta bake it, kami guna ayam je. Malas nak bakar guna oven mengah tu.
Hasilnye bleh tahan. =)

Nampaknye minggu ni byk projects nak diselesaikan. Better get my head straight =)

Sunday, December 13, 2009

Selamat pulang hubby =)

Hubby called when early this morning saying that he's already in Brisbane. Dia transit kat sana from LA. Seb baik, lama tak dgr suara dia, considering that he called everyday thru Skype masa dia kat sana. Tapi understandable coz dia bertolak from LA I think somewhere mlm Jumaat or pagi Sabtu, but coz dia kena cross the international time border between Au & U.S sana so dia akan rugi 1 day bila balik sini. So, will be picking him up around midday jap lagi. YAY!

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Aku bangun pagi dgn badan yg sakit2. Dah 2 pagi dah badan aku sakit2. Mebbie coz dok drive sana sini esp to the airport.. amik Dr MJ, gi kerja, ni jap lagi nak amik hubby, then mlm gi hantar Dr MJ gi airport lagi. And I've also restarted my intensive exercises 3,4 hari yg lalu. Selama 2,3 minggu I've let myself go again, mebbie coz stress keja kot. This time I'm stressed about work, I sorta jadi tak lalu nak buat apa2. Just nak rehatkan badan & otak. Ada la dlm sekali dua aku senaman berat dlm tempoh 2,3 minggu tu, itupon masa cuti 2 minggu hari tu. Pas tu terus jadi malas gila & continue with light stretching in da morning. No wonder baju mmg terasa ketat je. In terms of my weight, mmg dah lost 4kg kalau compare with the 8kg weight gain masa raya puasa hari tu. But I suppose I've to actually tone up part2 gelebeh2 tu so that I could be comfortable in my clothes again. Plus, aku pon dah tua, so metabolism makin turun & I do feel like I am not supposed to let myself go like this despite being stressed & anxious.

To be honest, I dont think psychiatry is ever for me.
I cant remember how many times I've said this, but it is the truth. I hate oncalls & the interruptions I get at home when I'm oncall. To me, once I get back home, I dont want to think about the hospital or the patients anymore. I dont want any strings attached. I want my life outside medicine. And I hate the fact that I hafta go to this stupid hearing every 2 wks and their massive paperwork prior to each hearing. Next week I haf 3 hearings, and the report for those 3. Benci betul.

The only thing that I like about the rotation is that I like the team that I work with... aaaand the fact that most of them think that I have such a babyface that I am probably in my early 20s. Hence the way they talk to me.. 'babytalk' (all those.. honey, sweetie, darling, manja2 way of talking to me) !... despite the fact that most of them also know that I am in my late 20's. Hehehehhehehe.. ok la tu. Patutnye pon aku in my early 20s considering I'm still a very junior HMO =P But hey, the figures dont really matter. My reproductive system might not agree with me, but age is just another number that yg penting kita mesti berjiwa muda =)
(part of my coping mechanism)
And it always makes my day bila kena buat referral & I get to talk to those people that I've known from physical medicine world. Walaupon aku kinda menci with the fact that my team now has such critical psych patients (termasukla yg 'disinhibited'), tapi looking at the bright side, because of these patients I get to speak to my 'physical medicine' frens. E.g. last week was very stressful, talking to my ED bosses, medical registrar, surg people, neuro, etc. really made my day. Esp. the ortho registar who made the effort to call me back 3 days in a row about this psychotic lady who kept on falling & injured her bones. Thanks to u guys that I'm still sane. At least takde la terasa trapped sgt kat facility tu.

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Dr. D, Ly & TTM are going to Chaddy mall this a.m. Aku nak gi amik hubby from the airport today so cant really join them. Kalau ikutkan, aku naaak sangat spend time with Dr. D coz dah lama tak jumpa but keadaan tak mengizinkan. The fact that they drove all the way thru from Adelaide.. whoa.. hebat betul. But takpe la, biar la dia spend time with family. Situationnye very limited & I respect that. Baby, family, time. Dun wanna be selfish to spend time with her. Mebbie next time. I'm glad that aku dpt jumpa dia smlm even tho sekejap. (And oh.. I really like their black Camry.. macho gilaa!)

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Me now reflux lagi coz makan byk sgt smlm :P (padan muka diri sendiri)
Seb baik ada PPi & Mylanta double strength tu. And some ginger tea. So kira under control la.
Ni nak siapkan list brg to my parents & also list perfume for Dr. MJ's mum.
Laundry, my reading list & hearing reports are waiting for me, but I'm just going to take it bit by bit so that aku tak mati from being overwhelmed.

Cant wait to see hubby :)

Saturday, December 12, 2009

I LOVE YOU!

~~~
12th December 2009
~~~
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Dearie HUBBY
Thanks for the love & life that we've shared together,
Semoga panjang umur & murah rezeki alwiz,
May we last forever as one, InsyaAllah,
Hugs & kisses,
Love you lots.

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Abah sent a beautiful birthday wish to hubby :) thanks lots. Love u. It will definitely make hubby's day. Alas he is on the plane rite now, so he'll read it when he's able to.. soon :)
Thanks heaps.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

To Z. Happy Birthday too. Take care. Glad to know that u share my hubby's birth day, :) Its been great knowing u.

Also to Z. & Imr. happy anniversary :D
Semoga bahagia ke akhir hayat.
Its a good date, isnt it? :D
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hari ni gi bbq kat rumah Ly. Its been gloomy & cold je this week. But today I can see the sun is starting to come out. Hopefully it stays that way. Thanks Ly. for organising this.

Yaaay... happy hour.
(wish hubby was here tho.. he is celebrating his birthday on the plane)


Thursday, December 10, 2009

Get geared up.. puhhleeaazzee..

Hehehehe.. that title is especially dedicated to me.

Nampaknye sejak seminggu ni mmg tak berminat langsung nak menyentuh hal2 psych ni. Bohsan. I cant take it. Kat tpt kerja dah bekerja keras. Pas tu kat rumah nak study lagi? Aisshhh.. bosan tul. Minggu ni sangat kontroversi. Have been having arguments wit people.. pathology, radiology, interpreter, patients, the stoopid surgical resident... u name it. Frustrating.
Yang pasal interpreter tu ialah interpreter utk Auslan (Australian sign language). Tak professional langsung; komplen pasal menyampah be in a psych facility, tak nak dok lama2 masa interview pt, tak interpret the right way, tak nak interpret some of patient's messages, blablabla, komplen sana-sini.. bodo betul.
And I seriously cannot see the same patient for more than 3days.. here in psych, involuntary patients mostly will be inpatients for weeks! D'oh!

Sabar je la...

My progress.. rasanye I'm better than last week. Even tho everything is still making me annoyed & restless tapi I think I am more efficient kot. Walaupon lebih slow & lembap, tapi I know I've been trying.

Its the 5th night now hubby not here with me. Dia dah habaq yg dia dah beli some stuff for me. Yay!! Dia ckp yg his presentation went very well. I'm so proud of him. Well done! Love ya!

This week jugak aku membusykan diri dgn internet & foncalls to M'sia. Macam2 hal kat sana.

Then went to Mazda workshop yesterday for a mini check up for my hensem baby. Part of the welcome pack. Last nite went to have dinner kat rumah member. Org2 kat ward ckp aku patut pegi Xmas party kat spital. But didnt go. Kurang berminat nak tgk org2 tu mabuk2 & make a fool of themselves. Plus aku dah lama nak tgk Cold Case kat tv.

Dr. D & fam r coming to Melb for the weekends. Driving down. Yay! Seronok nak jumpa dia. But at the same time, I'm kinda worried for mum & baby nak jalan jauh2. Hopefully both mum & bub are well everything.

Saturday ada bbq/hi-tea at Ly's place. Me going to make my 'ol potato salad.

Sunday hubby balik Melbourne.. YAY! Cant wait.
Same night, Dr. MJ balik M'sia.. huhuhuhu.. jelesnye..

Well, tomorrow is another day, same 'ol boring job on the ward. Anyhow, hopefully everything's fine for me as a conclusion to another week, another page of my life working as a doctor...

Monday, December 07, 2009

The start of the climb...

Like wat I sed yesterday, hari ni nak start fresh. Gi kerja awal semata-mata nak siapkan report for the Mental Health Review Board. Ada hearing today. Alhamdulillah takde la se-stress mcm hari Jumaat lepas masa aku tgh siapkan kerja tu. Mebbie coz dah nangis abis2 kot. The hearing itself wasnt as stressful as I thought it would be. Seb baik.
Like alwiz, Mondays & Fridays are alwiz the busiest days ever in a week. And the MHRB has to be on a Monday.. bleh sungguh. Dah la ada meetings mcm2, dgn new admissions. Yucks! I'm back to my busy ward job! Hmm...

Everyone has been very supportive. Alhamdulillah. Thinking back why aku breakdown Jumaat lalu, mebbie coz anxious about the car, then sedih hubby akan berlepas ke California (nak ikut!!), pas tu pasal work loads sumernyer tu.. then mebbie jugak pasal menstrual issue kot. Mebbie jugak aku masih blom lagi overcome terkujat from ED back to ward job. Huhuhu..

Ckp pasal tu, aku dah tau rotation apa I will start with for next year's Critical Care job. YAY! First few months kerja kat ED, the place I love. Hahaha. So kena la aku start study physical medicine balik PLUS mental health stuff. Hohohoho.. boleh ke?

Oh ye, hubby called 2x from California. Dia ckp kat sana sejuks. Seb baik dia bawak his winter coat. Hope he's well over there.

Missing him :(

Sunday, December 06, 2009

Me & myself

Just got home from sending hubby to the airport. He's travelling to the U.S. for a conference, will be coming back next week arriving to Melbourne on next Sunday. Sedihnyee... :(

And I'm back to my excruciatingly boring job :(

The car.. :) love it.
I knew that it drinks petrol like water, not like my old tiny car. Will hafta be careful on driving so that I could achieve the most echonomical driving pattern. And oh.. am bringing my car to the service centre for a mini check-up this week.

Huhuhu... back to my boring job :(
Hmm... trying my best to look on the bright side.. the job is day shift, with 1x a fortnight on calls. Good team. And its not in the bloody shit hole like last yr where I had to stay apart from hubby for a whole week in the middle of no where & work in the worst condition ever considering that this is a 'developed' country. Yeah, at least this is a metropolitan area not like that shit hole :(
If I survived that shit hole, I can survive this.. huhuhu..

Anyways, gotta get back on track. Too much rollercoaster last week. Its gonna be hard but hafta face it.
Just gotta be strong..

(Segan to admit this but I kinda like the Miley Cyrus- The Climb song)
I can almost see it.
That dream I'm dreaming,
but
There's a voice inside my head saying
You'll never reach it
Every step I'm takin'
Every move I make
Feels lost with no direction,
My faith is shakin'
But I gotta keep tryin'
Gotta keep my head held high

There's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be an uphill battle
Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose

Ain't about how fast I get there

Ain't about what's waitin' on the other side

It's the climb

The struggles I'm facing

The chances I'm taking

Sometimes might knock me down, but

No I'm not breaking I may not know it, but
These are the moments that
I'm gonna remember most
I've just gotta keep goin',
and
I gotta be strong
Just keep pushing on, but


There's always gonna be another mountain

I'm always gonna wanna make it move

Always gonna be an uphill battle

Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose
Ain't about how fast I get there

Ain't about what's waitin' on the other side

It's the climb

Keep on movin'

Keep climbin'
Keep faith baby
It's all about, it's all about
The climb
Keep the faith, keep your faith...

Saturday, December 05, 2009

Zoom zoom zoooomm =D

Yes.. thats what I'm feeling right now :)

Picked up my new baybeh at the showroom.. finally.
A Mazda3 Hatch. Black. Yaahooooo!! Seronoknyee...

All the hard work pays off now.. alhamdulillah.
Terubat gak all the dukacita minggu ni. Ni yg terasa semangat (sikit) nak gi kerja ni :P
Its quite a new experience driving this car. Its a jump from 1.0L engine to a 2.0L engine car. Double. It needs getting used to. Sooooo smooth bila drive laju. Best sangat. I just need to biasakan diri dgn kelajuan dia, anticipation of the distance, etc. Seb baik dah drive kereta Dr. H., its 1.8L car.. not much difference at all.
Tayar depan kanan
Tayar depan kiri
Tayar blakang kanan
Tayar blakang kiri
Saaayaaaaannnng pakwe sekor ni :D hahahahahhaha.. dah abis peluk, ride, kiss sumer dah :X
Zoom zoom zooooommm =D

Happy Birthday Mak! =X =X =X

Happy birthday, mak =)
semoga panjang umur,
murah rezeki selalu,
thanks for everything,
love you, alwiz.

hugss & kisses :x:x:x


Friday, December 04, 2009

That pain... d'oh!

Had an outburst at work today :((
Overwhelmed & felt dumb (I still feel dumb) & cried at work... untuk kesekian kalinye..
Had a 1hour plus consultation with my boss coz I cried.. he found out that I cried in the toilet (ni mesti nurse2 sibuks kasi tau ni). All in all, I cried coz I was disappointed in myself that I feel like I'm not in control of lotsa situations in here, like I was in ED. I hate not knowing what's going on around me, hate not being able to do anything about it, etc. I feel like I'm not up on par with everyone's expectation, I feel bad to ask for help..blablabla..
He must be diagnosing sumthing during this consultation.. like OCD, borderline, etc, which I couldnt care less. He doesnt really like it that I actually kept this for ~4wks until I had a break down today. Well, I did tell someone in ED that I wasnt coping well in psychiatry.
Its good that my boss knows this. And he has been very supportive, just like the other team members.
I guess I'm lucky that all the team members are very supportive & nice towards me.

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Wednesday: Had my driving test in the morning. I was the first examinee of the day, dgn this Indian lady yg my fren Dr. J had & failed coz she's very hmm... garang. When I first saw her, I thought.. "great, dgn makcik ni plak.. adohai... tak nak la fail!"
.. alhamdulillah I passed on that day. Alhamdulillah drove quite well (lagi berdisiplin more than setiap hari aku drive). Tapi makcik tu cam biasa la, ada je nak komen kan, agaknye dah takde menda lain nak komen pasal aku drive. Sedangkan dia dok main rambut la, spec la itu la ini la kat cermin. Hmm... apa-apa hal pon, dah pas dah pon. Hahahah.
I was quite excited coz it was a first trial & passed.. seb baik amik 3 hour of comprehensive revision with an instructor, the many hours of practising with Dr. H's car & doa from everyone.
Thanks guys.
So now I'm officially a Victorian driver. =)

Went to celebrate that night after sending back Dr. H's car at her place, went for dinner at Sakura Restaurant in Knox, a cool & yummy Japanese restaurant. Malangnye my gastritis & GORD were playing up. Was in agony while at the restaurant that I couldnt actually eat. I finished all my immediate gastritis meds at home & had some PPi but pain didnt come down. I was actually driving Dr. H's car with the pain. Seb baik dah slamat dlm garage dia. Hubby had to go to a closeby chemist to get me a double strength Mylanta, but the pain didnt go away immediately (well.. I knew this but saja, mmg tak sabar). Had to tapau food.. sayang betul.
Came back home & slept myself better.. bleh.

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Thursday: Fon call from the Mazda car dealer that my car would be ready as soon as I have the insurance settled. So had that done while at work. Then a few more fon calls.. then voilaa!! I'll get my car Saturday a.m. YAAAYYY!!.. alhamdulillah.
Its on my mum's birthday.. so in illusion, its mum's car.. in reality, its mine! Hahahahhaha... but deep down, I sorta wanted to call her to come over, so that I could bring her jalan-jalan with my new car. Or any of my family.
Then it hit me that hubby wont be around to send me to the showroom to pick up the car coz he's somewhere at the moment for a workshop & will be returning home Saturday arvo :(
Oh no!!!
Luckily I called RL & see if she could, & she sed yes. Alhamdulillah. Seb baik ada family kat sini. Thanks lots RL. =) Nanti I bawak u jalan2 okay, lets hope that ur baby gem bgn awal, then bleh I bawak both of u jalan2 naik my car. Thanks a lot. Hugs.

Went to see Cloudy With A Chance of Meatballs 3D at Chadstone. Superb. Excellent. Reaaally loved that movie! Kalau ada Wii games memang aku nak sambar satu. Tak pernah aku rasa cam nak beli games of any cool animation movies that I've seen before e.g. Kungfu Panda, Up, etc. But this one its different... coz there's FOOD! ahhahahaha... best best.. highly recommended for family fun.

BUT.. my gastritis & GORD datang lagi.. less severe. But it was actually affecting me afta that movie. Again, after some meds, I slept myself into it.

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Bang.. today had a breakdown with multiple symptoms of gastritis & GORD.
Looking back, no wonder I was having those symptoms since end of last week. I know that if I ate too much sampai takleh bernafas, or amik NSAIDs, or makan apples masa perut kosong, or minum soda too much, I akan dpt all the pain. But as far as I remember.. takde kot I overdose myself dgn NSAIDs or other things.. mebbie except for some soda, tapi tak byk pon.
Now it all came back to me that its because of STRESS that I've been having all these symptoms.
Yes, it must be it...
Stress mmg 1 independent factor that contributes to peptic ulcer & GORD & yg sekaum dgnnye.
I kno I've been stressing out in the past month.. mainly coz of work with this new rotation, driving test, buying a car & in-laws.

Oh well.. I certainly hafta manage that properly.. hate being in pain.. have been having all this since I was 8... thats like 20yrs now.. I know everything about it already to know if ada any prodromal symptoms & what triggers it. Should have known better than stressing out too much.
Oh well...

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I'm actually at work now, trying to finish some paperwork, havent started for the past hour, coz am playing around with the internet, saje nak rehat otak jap.. kejap lagi aku start.
Memang nak balik pon. Tapi hubby takde kat rumah. So takpe la stayback kejap kat tpt kerja.
Sket je lagi ni :)

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Yaaahooooo... esok amik kereta baru! =)
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